A Lack of Trust
by newmoon1220
Summary: Bella makes a mistake and its killing her inside to know she may have hurt Edward..alot.Bella and Edward work things out,but once Bella realizes her and Edward arn't on the same page about their relationship,she knows he has to change his thought process.
1. Wake Up Call

"Are you sure you'll be okay?" Edward asked for the fifth time while brushing my cheek softly.

"_Yes_," I answered, gazing sternly into his eyes. Edward, Emmett, Carlisle and Jasper were all heading off to their occasional hunting trip. Which left me without Edward yet another weekend. I wasn't fond of the idea, but there really weren't any choices. I hung my head and looked away from Edward.

"Hey," Edward said softly, lifting my chin with his free hand. "I'm a phone call away."

"I know," I sighed. He was trying to cheer me up, and I knew it killed him to see me upset. I forced a smile while looking into his eyes once more.

"I love you," he whispered in my ear. This time, I smiled for real.

"I know," I said again. He grinned.

"Wrong answer!" And in an instant, we shared our last passionate kiss before he waved from the car and drove off.

I walked back up the patio and thought of things to do on this fine Saturday morning... that for some reason didn't seem so fine anymore.

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"Please, Jessica!" I begged. She had to do this for me. It was the perfect opportunity to show Bella who is _really _the right guy for her.

"No, Mike, I can't do that to her and Edward," Jessica insisted yet again on the other line.

"But it's strictly friends, I swear, Jess! I swear to god, I just want to be friends with her again!"

I could hear Jessica sighing on the other line. It was working! I could sense her giving in.

"Alright, Mike, but no funny business, okay? And I'm serious!"

"You got it!" I reassured her before disconnecting the line. I stood there for a moment and finally chanted a nice, excited, "_Yes!_"

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I was sitting at the computer, my eyes fixed to the screen. Jessica had sent me an email with the cutest video I'd ever seen. They were cats, running into walls, hissing at their reflections in the mirrors, and jumping from couch to couch. They seemed all high, which was so adorable.

I needed a good laugh, anyways. I just wished Edward were here to watch it with me… ouch. Edward. I missed him and it had only been a couple hours since he left.

When I refreshed the page, I saw a new email, from Jessica. Hopefully, it was another funny video, because she had a great taste in humor.

To: Bella 

**From: Jessica**

**Subject: Good plans**

_Listen Bella, I don't wanna see you coped up in your room all day just cause Edward isn't there! Mike and me are planning to see a movie tonight and we want you to come. Meet us there at eight?_

_Jessica_

I smiled, and without hesitating, replied yes. If I needed anything, it was a night out with friends to clear up my fogged mind.

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Later that night, I took a shower and got dressed to go to the movies. I threw on just a simple t-shirt and jacket with dark jeans. I grabbed my keys and headed to Port Angeles to the movie theater.

Once there, I saw Mike waiting at the concession stand. He smiled hugely and headed up to hug me. It felt awkward, since Mike and me were only acquaintances.

"Where's Jessica?" I asked him as we walking to our theater where we were to watch some silly romance comedy.

When he didn't answer, I looked over to him. He just smiled and finally said, "She couldn't make it."

And at that point, I felt most uncomfortable.

We took seats towards the top. Mike held a bag of popcorn and a soda, and me, a water bottle. He kept smiling at me from across, and I tried my best to return them as realistic as possible.

"So, do you like romantic comedies?" Mike asked casually as the previews played.

"Um, they can be funny." There was a short silence. Then, I added, "Well, I like them more than horror movies."

Mike laughed. "Yeah, I can see where you're coming from." And just then, a commercial for a horror movie played. I looked away as people were shred to pieces and screamed their heads off. I saw Mike laughing at me. He didn't seem affected by it at all!

"Hey, don't laugh!" I whined and playfully hit him on the shoulder.

"It's over," he said shakily, trying to suppress his laughter. "Oh wait, brace yourself!" I looked away even further, but slowly turned to face the screen as I heard sweet music playing, the kind you don't hear in horror films. And what do you know, it was a preview for The Spongebob Squarepants Movie!

I instantly blushed as Mike continued to laugh hysterically. "That's cruel!" I said to him sarcastically. I pouted as he continued to laugh.

"Oh, that was funny, Bella! _You're _funny!" We looked into each other's eyes for a moment and smiled. For some reason, I think this all meant much more to him than it did to me. But I know I could keep things under control. I'd enjoy my time with Mike as a friend, whether he viewed it like that or not.

When the movie finally ended, I concluded that I had a great time. There were so many funny scenes that at one point I had began tearing up with laugher. Mike would through a tissue in my face while laughing his head off as well. My legs felt like jello as we headed out of the theater and continued to laugh here and there.

"Wow, that was just hilarious!" Mike exclaimed.

"I know," I agreed happily. "I'll be sure to drag Edward to this one." And suddenly, the laughter was over. Mike's face grew grim for a moment, and I knew I should not have just said that in his face. Great, I just ruined the mood!

"Let's get some ice cream," I suggested. And it worked; Mike's face was beaming once more.

"Okay!"

Turns out Mike asked the cashier to mix the vanilla and rainbow sorbet together. The cashier looked skeptical, but fulfilled the customer's orders as he was paid to do. I got a scoop of chocolate and was slightly disgusted as Mike ate his multi-flavored ice cream. However, after the second bite, he gave up and threw it away.

"Ugh, that wasn't too tasty," he admitted. We sat down together on the grass near a fountain. Eventually, I threw my ice cream away.

"What time is it?" I asked. It was very dark outside, so I guess it was really late.

Mike looked over to his watch. "It is…almost eleven."

"I should get going," I sighed. I got up to my feet.

"Wait!" Mike called. "I mean, can't we just sit and talk a little?"

I smiled and sat back down. "Sure."

We sat there for a couple minuets, looking at the star filled sky.

"Hey, Mike, I had a really great time," I finally said. And I was being completely honest. "I mean, it's been a while since I had this great of a time with friends."

"Me too, Bella." I looked at Mike to see him staring at me suggestively. This was the time to put my guard up. Mike was too ahead of himself. I had to be carefully…I couldn't let Edward down.

"Listen, Bella, I'm having a pool party tomorrow and I'd really love it if you would come. Jessica will be there and a bunch of other people."

"Sure, Mike! I'd love to!"

He smiled, content with himself. Just then, I realized how awfully close Mike was sitting to me. His hand lifted my chin to face him. His piercing blue eyes were gazing into mine. He leaned in, closer and closer. My heart was racing. What was going on? Why wasn't my guard up? Why couldn't I stop him? Why? Why is he doing this to me? I closed my eyes and imagined it was Edward. Imagined he was here with me.

He whispered in my ear seductively, "You're so beautiful, Bella." And then his lips moved towards mine. I felt his hand snake up my back. I took mine and brushed it off gently, knowing this was completely wrong and that I would regret it. But his eyes were so distracting that his hand was the only thing I pushed away. For the first time, a pair of warm lips touched mine. For a mere second, I enjoyed the warmth. The feeling of another human being's lips. It felt right, in one sense. But I immediately opened my eyes and pulled away, or at least tried to. Mike's hands were now holding my head to his. I pushed him off, and when he got the message he let go. And that's when I saw the person I had just betrayed standing right in front of me.

"Edward!" I gasped while jumping to my feet. Mike flailed behind him to see Edward towering over him. Edward's hate-filled eyes were on me, then on Mike. He stared at Mike for a few moments. I hoped to God he wouldn't make a mistake and hurt Mike. But his eyes…they scared me. I was afraid to look at them. Edward walked over to me as I looked away. He stood in front of me for a moment. I could feel my heart beating harder and faster than it had ever done before, and surely Edward could feel it. He lifted my chin so I looked right into his eyes.

But this time they weren't filled with hate. Tears began streaming from the corners of my eyes. He was heartbroken. I could tell by the look in his innocent gaze. He looked disappointed, upset, shocked; everything a broken hearted person would feel. The tears were falling so fast down my cheeks. I felt horrible. I had broken his heart. I felt truly, honestly, horrible.

And I was scared. Not of his temper or what he might do to Mike. But of our relationship, our love. It couldn't end this way, over a mistake I made. I wished I could say I was sorry and tell him over and over again I didn't mean it. But I couldn't, because it didn't matter. He wouldn't believe me. Edward just saw me kiss another guy. And not just any guy, _Mike Newton._

"Edward…" I whispered, my voice cracked and shaky. He opened his mouth to say something, but nothing came out. Instead, he walked away.

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**Hmm... Please Review? Should I continue!**


	2. What I've Done

**_What I've Done _by Likin Park. Thanks for the reviews guys!**

_"Edward…" I whispered, my voice cracked and shaky. He opened his mouth to say something, but nothing came out. Instead, he walked away._

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"Bella, I-"

"Please, Mike. Don't say anything. I have to go home." I sniffed and wiped the tears away from my eyes.

"Sure you'll be okay?" he asked dumbly.

"NO! No, Mike! No, I will not be okay! Just leave me alone! I don't want to ever see you again!" With that, I stormed off to my truck.

As I got inside, my stomach was turning. I loved Edward more than anything in the world. So why did I kiss Mike? Why didn't I back away? All these thoughts and questions flew crazily in my mind. I had a headache. I felt sick. I couldn't possible drive anymore.

I pulled my truck on the side of the road. It was raining outside, just like it did every night. I flipped my hood on and sat on the dirt. I leaned my body on the truck and began to cry. I was angry with myself. I needed Edward now, now, when I was cold and helpless and afraid. But he wouldn't be here for me. Not now, not after I betrayed him.

"Edward, I need you," I whispered while burying myself in a tight ball. I wished he could hear me and come to me. But who knew if he could ever forgive me, let alone trust me.

When it hit me it was past midnight, I suddenly felt tired. So tired, and overwhelmed, that I didn't bother getting up. I laid my head against the tire and closed my eyes while the rain washed away my tears. I silently hoped that the rain could wash away my problems, too. And with that thought, I fell asleep.

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"Bella, honey, wake up." Someone was nudging my shoulder. My wet, shoulder, I realized. Wait, why was it wet? I opened my eyes to see Alice's worried face hovering over me. My eyes felt dry and salty and my entire body was wet. With that thought, all the memories from the previous now flooded back, leaving me torn up inside.

"Alice," I cried and sat up to hug her.

"Here take these and go change," she said while handing me some comfy clothes. "Then, we'll talk."

"Where's Edward?" I asked. She raised her eyebrows. Seeing it coming from Alice made me feel even guiltier. Without any more questions, I walked upstairs the Cullen mansion and changed in Alice's room.

Once downstairs and dry, Alice motioned me to sit across from her. I sat comfortably on the couch with a blanket. There was a very long silence until Alice finally spoke.

"Bella, what's going on?" I was ready to tell her my side of the story, guessing she already knew exactly what was going on.

"I…I messed up, Alice." The tears started coming again.

"Tell me what happened."

"O-okay," I nearly whispered. Alice sat patiently, waiting for me to speak.

"Mike, Jessica and me were supposed to go to see a movie together," I began. "But when I got there, Mike said Jessica wasn't coming." My voice still was cracking. I cleared my throat and continued with more volume in my voice.

"At first, it was awkward, I mean I never really bonded with Mike before. But we ended up having a really good time. And I realized Mike was a good friend. I ended up kissing him, Alice! Kissing Mike Newton!" At this point, I was crying hard again. She came over to hug me but I gently pushed her away.

"No, please don't. If anyone needs comforting, it's Edward." There was more silence. Then I continued.

"Alice, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean for it to happen. I knew he liked me differently than I liked him, and I almost saw it coming, the kiss I'm talking about. And I kept telling myself I wouldn't let it happen but in the end, it did. I closed my eyes, and was lost in an epiphany. I imagined it was Edward, because I missed him, but once I realized how warm his lips were…" Alice sighed. "I knew that what I was doing was very, very wrong."

Alice took my hand. "Edward is understanding, Bella. And he loves you too much to ever hate you. We'll work this out."

"Do you think he'll forgive me?" I asked, hopelessly.

"Yes." I looked up in surprise. "Edward made mistakes too, remember? But you forgave him. It will take time, Bella. But he will forgive you."

"Where is he now?"

"I'm not sure. He's probably thinking things through. You can talk to him tomorrow."

I immediately stood up. "No! I need to talk to him now! I need to see him! You know Edward when he thinks things through! He does the wrong thing. For all we know he could be on a flight to Italy. Oh, what have I done?" I began crying in my hands before Alice sternly removed them away from my face.

"Isabella, don't you ever say such things! He _loves _you Bella! He doesn't love you any less! Now, I want you to go to sleep. It's two in the morning and I can tell you're exhausted."

"But I have to talk to him Alice! Please," I begged like a child.

"Bella, trust me. Go to sleep. I will talk to him, I promise. Tomorrow, everything will be worked out, okay? Go sleep in my bed. I told Charlie you're spending the night."

"Okay," I finally gave in. "Thank you, Alice. For everything." I gave her one last hug.

"Everything will be fine," she reassured again. I headed upstairs to her bedroom and climbed in her bed. After closing my eyes, I felt a single teardrop slide down my cheek before entering a heavy slumber.

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I headed outside to find Edward. In a way, Bella was right. When Edward though things through, especially when he didn't know the whole story, he made bad decisions. I sensed him somewhere near water.

I found him sitting on the sand beside the beach. He was gazing out into the almost invisible ocean that was embedded with a blanket of black. _I need to talk to you, _I thought.

He sighed heavily. "Is she okay?"

"She asked the same thing about you," I answered, smiling. I went to sit by him. However, his expression was thoughtful and serious, far from any smiles.

"Is she safe?" he rephrased, still looking out into the horizon.

"Soundlessly sleeping in my bed." I looked at his pained expression.

"What are you thinking, Edward?" Hearing the waves rolling onto the sand created was relaxing.

"Why would she do that? After everything?" His voice was calm and confused. "If she loves Mike, I want her to be with him. Not with me. He's better for her."

"Whoa, Edward, slow down! You don't know her side of the story. And she certainly does _not _love him!"

"Then why?" he asked again.

"You left her for a hunting trip. She missed you're company! She imagined she was kissing you, but…"

"But?"

_But his lips were warm, she said. And she realized it couldn't possibly be you. _Edward growled in frustration.

"Edward, you should have seen her. She was killing herself! She felt absolutely horrible. I found her sitting on the dirt against her truck, sleeping in the rain. You have to listen to what she has to say and forgive her. Bella didn't mean it, Edward. She was so worried about you and mad at herself."

He looked down in the sand with a heavy heart. "She needs you, Edward. She loves you and needs you. We all make mistakes and have to learn to forgive."

"Alice, forgiving Bella isn't the main problem here! Of course I will forgive her. But her feelings for Mike…"

"Are not there. It was a kiss, and that's it. Nothing beyond that."

"I want to see her." Edward got to his feet. I nodded, and we both made our way back.

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I pushed open the door to Alice's room and walked inside. There, tangled between blankets and pillows was my Bella. My sweet, innocent, Bella.

I walked over to the bed. Her cheeks were blushed. She looked so peaceful…and defiantly tired. I brushed my fingers on her cheek. This incident with Mike is a sign. I'm _not _good for Bella. Maybe I love her more than she loves me. Maybe making every second she lives danger filled isn't worth it. Heck, it _really _isn't worth it. Bella deserves better. But how can I leave her again? I'm a selfish creature. How can I do that to myself, let alone her?

This wasn't right. I'm toying with her life. And that's not something Mike can do.

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**Uh oh, Edward and his craziness. But don't worry guys, he WON'T leave again, I promise thats _not _where this story is heading. Please review! It's really encouraging. I'll update as soon as I can!**

**Also, I'd just like to mention the title of the previous chapter is _Wake Up Call _by Maroon Five.**


	3. One Step Closer Part 1

**I just want to thank all my reviewers!**

**I'm going to an overnight camp for three weeks. So sorry, but I won't be able to update. But please add me to your alert list so when I get back and post you can at least keep reading. Thanks guys!**

**_One Step Closer _by Linkin Park. Yes, I love Linkin Park!**

_This wasn't right. I'm toying with her life. And that's not something Mike can do._

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I woke up feeling as if I'd been sleeping for a hundred years straight.

I rolled to the side of my bed. Instead, I just fell off and hit my butt hard off the ground. I stayed there for a moment, confused, almost expecting someone to catch me. But wait- oh yeah- I crushed that special someone's heart. When I opened my eyes, I realized I was in my room. Wasn't I supposed to be in Alice's room? Oh well.

I got up and headed to the bathroom. My eyes looked tired. And depressed. My hair was messier than ever. I looked terrible.

I didn't have time to take a shower, but I jumped in anyways. Showers rocked. Always so comforting, the warm water cascading down a numb back. Yes, I was numb. Everywhere.

After getting dressed, I grabbed my things and headed down to my truck. Just when I was about to get in, I heard a worried Charlie.

"Hey, Bells, is everything okay?" He walked out of the house in his suit with the newspaper in his hand.

"Perfect," I lied. He didn't buy it one bit.

"You sure?" he asked skeptically.

"Just a rough night. See ya soon, dad."

"Bye, honey!"

I finally turned on the car and drove to school.

Why was I even going to school? What business did I have there? Nothing. My thoughts were unclear. Mood: Apathetic.

I didn't see Edward until break. It was awkward. I was too afraid to go talk to him. Thankfully, Jessica came up to distract me.

"So, how was the movies?" she asked.

"Great."

"Doesn't sound like it was too 'great'," she pointed out. We sat down at the table. I peeked at Edward from the corner of my eye. Nosy, little, Edward. He was easdropping. But what right did I have to be mad at him? None, of course. I put on the most ashamed-of-myself look I could possible manage, just to make things clear.

"It wasn't actually," I finally said. My eyes turned to Jessica.

"What's up with you and Edward?" she said, following my gaze.

I grabbed Jessica's arm and pulled her away. "Let's talk somewhere else." As if Edward wouldn't hear anyways.

"What happened?"

"Jess, it ruined everything! I totally messed up. I kissed him! He leaned in and kissed me and I returned it!"

"You what?" she gasped.

"I only returned it for a sec though!"

"Did you push him off?" Jessica asked, still shocked slightly.

"Yeah, but it was too late…oh my god…"

Jessica's face fell. "No way- did he see you? Did Edward see you?"

"Yes," I nearly cried. _And here comes the tears._

"Oh, I'm gonna kill Newton!" she hissed. I looked at her, confused.

"What? What do you mean?"

Jessica looked apologetically at me. "I kinda didn't come on Mike's wishes."

My eyes grew wide, my face pink. "You _what?_ You did this?"

"He said no funny business! But I should have known!"

"Jessica!" I moaned. "How could you?"

"I'm sorry, Bella! But every time Edward leaves for the whole weekend I hate to see you so upset! I mean, you just mope around like he's your life and without him your…lifeless!"

Oh god. I looked around nervously. I _really, really, __really_ hoped Edward didn't just hear that.

"No, I'm not that mopey…" I pointlessly defended.

"Oh, please! Yes you are! Lifeless, Bella! Besides, I had no idea he was planning on kissing you."

"I saw it coming, but I was so sure I'd stop him. Weird thing was, I didn't."

"So do you like him?" Jessica said uneasily.

"_No!_ God, no! Only as a friend. I just needed someone to…kiss." The bell than rang.

"Look, I have to go to class. I'll talk to you later, ok? It's not the end of the world, Bella!"

_Oh, but it is. _I sighed and headed off to my next class.

I was thankful for Trigonometry, as hard as it was to believe. It took my mind off everything, though that wasn't the best way to fix certain problems right now. But what I dreaded most was my next class. Biology.

What was I supposed to say to him? I'm acting pathetic. I have no idea what to say! I wouldn't be able to concentrate, and I bet neither would he. So I decided to skip and hopefully get the chance to talk to him.

I hid behind one of the buildings. It was a cold foggy day, just like my mood. I whispered his name, hoping he could hear me. Finally, I found my voice and said a little louder, "_Edward._"

And as suspected, a shadow walked around the corner. I slumped back, ready for one hell of a conversation. I turned around; I wasn't ready to look him in the eye yet.

"Ms. Swan?"

My head snapped back. It was the assistant principle, Mrs. Anderson! I sighed in frustration. There goes my brilliant plan.

"Hi, Mrs. Anderson."

"What are you doing out here?" She questioned predictably. "Not skipping class, now are we?"

"No," I lied meekly. "Just going to the bathroom."

She raised her perfectly shaped eyebrows. "Do you have a pass?"

My face dropped. "No…"

She nodded, not surprised one bit. "Come with me then."

I sighed and followed her. She held the door open in the office for me and picked up the phone.

She called Charlie, but fortunately he wasn't able to come over. What was this, preschool? Geez, I'd love to go home.

"I can drive myself home," I suggested casually.

Mrs. Anderson shook her head. "No can do, hun. I believe this isn't the first time you've skipped!"

Of course. Edward always skipped with me. I had lots of period-length absences, and now Mrs. Anderson knew whoever excused them were mistaken. I gulped. Me and Charlie would have a lot to talk about this evening.

"I can drive her home," a familiar voice suggested. Once my brain comprehended who it was, my heart started beating faster.

I turned around to see Edward walking towards her desk. He leaned in on it, approaching closer to her. Mrs. Anderson was falling for his old "dazzling tricks". I scoffed. Them vampires have it _so _easy.

"Um…sure…I guess," she stumbled. Edward flashed her a handsome smile and leaned away from her. Although his smile quickly faded as he glanced at me. It was still there, but so faint.

We headed outside to the parking lot in silence. Suddenly, I stopped dead in my tracks as Edward continued to his Volvo. When he realized I had stopped, he did too and turned to look at me. I had had enough of this silence.

"Edward," I began, with as much courage as possible. "Edward… what's bothering you?" Oh. My. God. What a stupid, stupid, thing to ask. I scrunched my eyes together and caught my breath. "I mean…"

"What's bothering me?" he replied, his tone bitter. "What's bothering me, Bella, is the fact that you macked Newton!" Wait- did he just say _macked?_ His expression was pretty mad and distressed.

"It was a simple, little, kiss, Edward!" I protested. I found it difficult to say the word _kiss _however. It pained me.

He shook his head. "How can I know that?" he muttered quietly. Loud enough for me to hear, however.

"Because you can _trust _me," I said, moving closer to him. My hand touched his cheek. Then I crushed my head into him. My arms wrapped around him in a tight hug. It took him a few moments to hug me back. I felt a lump barging up my throat. My eyes were getting watery and…shoot, I was going to cry…_again._

"And I'm sorry," I added, my voice muffled. "I _love _you."

"And what about Mike?" he shot back, pulling me away from him. I looked into his eyes, shocked and disgusted.

"Mike? _Mike?! _What about Mike? Nothing! I don't like him, heck, I _hate _him for what he did. And I hate myself too."

His eyes were melting with hurt, which only made me feel worse. "Don't," he whispered quietly.

"What?" I asked.

"Don't hate yourself."

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**Hehe there conversation isn't over yet...but it was too long to post, I'd rather post it later. See you guys in three weeks!**


	4. One Step Closer Part 2

**Sorry about the three week wait:) I had a GREAT time! On with the story...**

_"Mike? Mike?! What about Mike? Nothing! I don't like him, heck, I hate him for what he did. And I hate myself too."_

_His eyes were melting with hurt, which only made me feel worse. "Don't," he whispered quietly._

_"What?" I asked._

_"Don't hate yourself."_

I looked away from him, expressionless. I think I was misunderstanding why he was hurting. Wait- hold on a sec- why _was _he hurting?

"Edward, what do you mean?"

"I mean," he began calmly, "that you shouldn't hate yourself. First and foremost, I completely forgive you." I sighed in relief. That is what I wanted to hear.

"So you still love me?" I asked. He looked at me in horror.

"Of course!" he exclaimed. "Why would you ever think not- oh god!"

I looked at him, confused. "What is it?"

"Let me make some things clear here, Bella! I _do not _love you any less. Yes, I might be a bit…disappointed," I flinched, "but it's nothing I can't forgive. What bothers me is how you savored the human kiss. You haven't ever really _kissed _a human before, have you?"

I shook my head. Honestly, I haven't, and I didn't like where this was going. He continued.

"And now I can't help but to ask, if you ever think Mike is better for you, if you want him more than me, I won't think twice in understanding and letting go."

I stood in shock, grasping what he had just said. Then, in realization, I gaped. I gaped and gasped and snapped back into reality.

"Oh my gosh," I said. "Oh my god!" This time I shrieked it. I tore away from Edward and franticly walked back and forth, grasping my hair in my hands. He quickly followed, and forced me to look at him.

"What?" He asked, fully concerned. I took in small, short breaths. This is _exactly _what I had been dreading.

"Bella!" He exclaimed, shaking my shoulders. I finally opened my mouth to speak.

"How could you think such things?" I cried. "How, Edward Cullen, _how_?"

He stared incrediasly at me. Then, his entire face became grimly afraid.

"Wh-what did I say?" he stammered.

"You know what?" I said, frustrated, "I knew this was all too good to be true. _You're _too good to be true." He suddenly grabbed me into his arms and locked his gaze on my eyes.

"What are you saying?" He asked icily. He wasn't mad at me, just at where I was getting at.

"What in the world is wrong with you? Why do you always _doubt _my love for you? Why can't you just accept the fact that I _cannot _live without you, and when you leave me for more than an hour I am a total wreck? How could you even _consider _the impossible possibility that I love Mike? How can you _ever, _in a million years, think something as wrong as that, when right here, in front of me, is _you?_ The best thing that ever happened to me!"

He was speechless. I was mad. Angry. This was impossible. I could not handle this. It was too much. I could scream it a million times. _WHY CAN'T YOU JUST GET IT IN YOUT LITTLE PEA BRAIN THAT I LOVE YOU?_

And I liked that thought. So, I yelled it out loud, in his face.

"Bella," he whimpered. I could defiantly see that my words had crushed him. They were inconveniently, painfully, true. And being the stubborn guy he is, he just didn't want to hear it.

"Edward, you can't handle the truth, face it!" I don't think Edward _ever _saw me this mad before.

"I'm so sorry…" he was walking towards me but I held my hands out and backed away.

"No! No, I can't handle this! I love you more than anything, but if this is going to work, you have to accept that. It's a little four-letter word called _trust,_ Edward. A key component in a relationship. If you can't trust me, than for all I care, go give in to the Volterri, because it hurts me _way _too much to try and _pretend _we are the _perfect _couple; BECAUSE WE AREN'T!"

I had been shaking the whole time I had been yelling my little speech. I bet I felt the same way saying it all that Edward felt hearing it. My knees were tired and finally gave in. I slumped on the floor and buried me head into my knees. Edward sat beside me. He pulled me onto his lap and hugged me as I cried on him.

I didn't bother pulling away. I mean, what can I do, I _loved_ the bastard. If I wanted to cry on someone's shoulder, it had to be his. So that's what I did.

"Bella," he said finally after rubbing my back to help calm me. I pulled away and sat beside him. "Bella, everything you said, it hit me like a ton of bricks. You're absolutely right, about everything. I know now." He smiled weakly, and it was obvious it was very forced. I looked away, trying to find my voice to say what had to be done.

"No, I don't think you _do _know. Not yet, at least." I sighed. He looked at me, confused. "Edward, maybe we should take some time off. I want you to take some time and think about what I said. You _have _to change. And even if you don't, I'll love you all the same. Loving you isn't the problem, Edward. That's set in stone. It's _being _with you that's the problem. It hurts me to hear you say such things. Then it hurts even more to imagine what you're _thinking._"

His eyes grew wide. This would be tough for him, I knew that. But he had to understand. He had to change.

"I understand," he finally whispered. His voice was nearly cracked. He got to his feet and reached out a hand for me. I grabbed it thankfully and he pulled me up. I quickly brushed off the dirt from sitting on the pavement.

"But it's not anything serious," I added. "I mean, like I said before, I can't live without you. I'll be with you no matter what the outcome is because I'm _meant _to be with you and it makes me happy." He sighed and looked down. "This is your chance to changed. Please, forgive me," I pleaded. He looked up.

"There is nothing to forgive you for," he replied. "You're right about everything. I'm a blind vampire."

And as ironic as that sounded, it was true. He smiled and I laughed a bit.

"So, can I drive home alone?" I asked with a sly smile. He returned it, suspiciously playful. But still, it looked a bit pained.

"It's all yours," he said while throwing me the keys. I missed at catching them and blushed violently. He chuckled. He had them in his hand before I could even reach down to get them. Edward walked over to me and took my hand. He slid the key into my palm, but didn't let go. He lifted my hand and kissed it. I blushed as he turned around. But there was one more thing I wanted to make sure.

"Edward?"

He looked back at me with a hopeful expression.

"Can you promise me something?"

"Sure," he sighed.

"Promise me that you'll stay, _here,_ in Forks." I said this with a weak smile. "Meaning, no crazy plans or anything that will scare me to death."

He chuckled at my casual tone. "I promise," he said with a crooked smile.

"I love you," I whispered. His topaz eyes glimmered and a small smile formed.

"I love you too, Isabella."

And with that, he turned around, and I drove away, feeling anxious…and yet happy that things could change.

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